I recently completed “A Heat Of The Moment Thing”, an 89,000-word contemporary romance with humour, and I hope you will consider representing me. [Good - title, genre, word count all provided and I can read on with this in mind.]
Becky Jansen doesn’t do relationships. She can barely manage a one-night stand. But put her in a swimming pool, add a close and bloody encounter with the wall and she’s scored herself the hottest guy ever as her hero. [Great hook. 'Close and bloody encounter with the wall' is ambiguous enough to make me think you're writing in some racy subgenre I haven't yet discovered.] On her return to work, there he is. Hot guy. Her new boss. She might have been interested before, but not now. Hell, no. Work and personal just don’t mix; been there, done that, got the scars. But Matt’s confident, he’s got her in his sights, and he’s making it damn hard for her to say “no”.
Becky needs a distraction—fast. Charlie is the perfect solution. Rich, good-looking and a shameless playboy, he’ll keep things simple and that’s just what she needs—or so she thinks. But a Matt-versus-Charlie altercation isn’t her idea of simple. And when her sister gets involved—that’s when things become downright complicated.
[Good, good, all good - you've kept the description short and sweet and loaded it with hooks.]
“A Heat Of The Moment Thing” is my debut novel. It has placed in both US and UK writing competitions. [Again, concise and useful. And if I want more information I'll ask you - I actually don't need all the details of the competitions at this stage.]
Although my CV reads economist-turned-teacher, I currently juggle motherhood, lecturing and freelance writing. However, my career aspirations are in full-length fiction. I am working on my second novel, with concept plans for a further three. [Great - I know that you're writing because you love it and that you have kept on writing - you're not just pinning your hopes on this particular project.]
Many thanks for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.
Overall: gold star. Even if romance isn't the agent's genre, you've provided enough information for an agent/publisher to make up their mind.